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Clarification & Other Random Thoughts

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some of you who know me have been here from the beginning of my journey. from even before i was ttc. others of you came somewhere in the middle, and others still are fairly new friends.

but those of you who know me know that my babies mean everything to me. i have gone through MUCH in my pregnancies, and i would (and am LOL) do it again, because that’s how much i love my kids.

when i made the comment the other day, i didn’t really explain what i mean. yes, i’m pretty sure this will be the last pregnancy. if, God forbid, something should happen to baby j-bug, and we lost him/her, of course i would feel differently, and would probably want to try again. but if this pregnancy continues to delivery, i am saying we probably will not TRY to conceive again.

as i mentioned, we probably won’t use surgical measures to prevent pregnancy. but i won’t TRY to get pregnant anymore, like figuring when the time is right for conception, etc. if by some miracle we conceive again, i won’t curse God or anything! we will take the blessing and be happy with it! but we just aren’t going to TRY to conceive anymore. i hope this makes sense to everyone.
those of you who have been through HG hopefully know what i mean. it’s utterly debilitating. even when you’re NOT vomiting, you FEEL like vomiting. your entire world is miserable and ICKY. the time that should be joyful, isn’t.

don’t get me wrong. as i said, i LOVE my baby!!!! i am VERY thankful to be pregnant. i am extremely blessed. to conceive one time, let alone three, is a miracle. i honestly just can’t believe it. i cry when i think about how amazing it is, and how blessed i am.

i just know that this isn’t fair. it’s not fair to my boys. it’s not fair to my husband. and it’s not fair to me. it’s not fair to my mom, either, who has been helping me out like crazy!

it’s possible that we may still get our dream of adoption one day. anything’s possible.

even with the generic zofran i am still feeling horrible. not vomiting all the time, about 1-2 times a day now, but still feeling like vomiting ALL.THE.TIME. it is rare to see me smile for real, even tho the boys can get a small smile out of me sometimes. 😉

another thing that is totally making me an emotional basket case: the dr would like me to wean josiah. i don’t think he would have suggested it if my pregnancy was “normal” but since i’m losing so much fluid anyway, to give josiah some really takes away from me and the baby. it’s REALLY hard. i have been cutting back on the few sessions we have, and he is not handling it well. he SCREAMS and cries and pulls on my shirt and says “NUHHSSSSSS” and breaks my heart. 🙁 🙁 if anyone knows of any good weaning tips, i’d love to hear them. it is not going well for both of us. i’m just such an emotional basket case already, that when he’s so upset i don’t know what to do. any help to make it easier would be great.
well i’ve about spent my time, and gotten up a few times in between. sometimes i have to just go lie on the recliner and then come back. sigh.

please continue to pray for me. love you guys!

Jenn

I'm a Christian wife to an amazing man and a stay-at-home-teaching mom to four special & incredible boys (14, 12.5, 10.5, & 8).  Sign up for posts, deals, & updates. Find me on Facebook (Writer page) (Fan page) (Community group), Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram, and Google+.

This Post Has 10 Comments

  1. Sorry I don’t have any tips for you on the weaning. Mine weaned themselves. I hope it gets easier and you start to feel better.

    I understand what you are saying! I love my kids and love having babies, but these three are wearing me out I don’t know if I could handle another one. Babies are easy, it’s when they grow up that’s the hardest. Least for me. Remember my three are several years apart so they are all going through different phases.

    I’m praying for you!

  2. I’m sorry I don’t have any weaning tips. Sadly, I’ve never been there before…

    Whatever you feel is the best for you and your family, is the right thing… I just wish you weren’t so sick. 🙁

    Maybe you’ll get lucky and it won’t last past the 1st trimester.

    Love you!
    Julie

  3. I had to wean a baby during a pregnancy due to HG too. Physically, I was unable to handle the strain of both breastfeeding and the HG. It was heartbreaking and I sympathize.

    What helped me was that the meds and pregnancy made my milk taste off, so he wasn’t too keen on it. In fact, once he grabbed my breast in his fist, looked at me with a disgusted face and said “Blah!” while he tried to throw it in the floor. He was communicating to me the best he could that my milk was not up to par. 🙂

    We also developed a special time and special routine in place of the nursing where I introduced him to new foods and snacks that he liked, which made it easier on him. Making it special and fun made it easier. It took a while and we shed a few tears together, but we got it done. His brother Caleb was born big and healthy. I felt better after weaning too.

    We’ll keep praying for you. I appreciate your prayers for me too. I can’t do all of the e-mail every day, but am trying to post to the Contentment Acres blog. I added a link to here in the sidebar since after I posted a prayer request for you, some of my readers wrote in saying they were praying for you too.

    I’ve been vertical too long today, so going “flat” until tomorrow.

    Blessings,
    Wendy

  4. I can’t even imagine the misery you describe going on and on. You are in my prayers.

  5. Nursing was the one thing while I was pregannt with DD2 that helped my nausea abate. As soon as I felt a wave of “ucky” sweep over me I would grabe DD1 up and offer a nursing session.

    I’m sorry that you are going through all of this. Is there something that you could be doing to help with your own hydration? Like ice or soups?

    For whatever it’s worth, your body will care for your baby before it produces what you need for nursing. It’s pretty cool like that.

  6. I was like Manda. I had pretty bad hyperemesis also, but nursing really helped me out. It made me relax and seemed to soothe my tummy.

  7. Oh My Goodness…..Congratulations mamma! I’m so happy for you! Its been way too long since I’ve been here. I’m so sorry for that. I hope you and yours had a wonderful holiday season. I’m sorry you are not feeling well. I rememeber your other pregnancies and I know its tough but you know what your reward will be. I’m also sorry that this time around I can’t do it with ya. I’m almost sure we are done. If we do have another it won’t be for at least another 3 years b/c I’m so overwhelmed alot of the time with 2. I am so happy for you though. I promise I will catch up and read your blog when I get some time…..I am also going to start blogging regularly again….hopefully! I will talk to you soon. Michelle

  8. oh, mama, I wish I had some weaning tips for you, but I don’t (( hugs )) maybe on kellymom.com? I’ll be praying for you … I hope the sickness goes away soon …

    Best Wishes! You’ve got my prayers (( hugs ))

  9. hi jenn. don’t feel guilty about feeling the way you do. it’s very rough. intense morning sickness is VERY hard to deal with, especially when you have 2 already to take care of. i don’t think i could do it. i had to wean adriana because of the same reason. i was so dehydrated, and my milk just stopped coming in. i was sooo sad. although it was probably about time for her to stop, i still miss it. it brought us very close. as for tips on weaning, i don’t really have any except persistence. try to offer something else or divert his attention away. that’s kinda what i had to do with adri because she was sucking on a nipple, with nothing coming out and it HURT. i hope you feel better hang in there this will ALL go away!!!!!

  10. I will keep praying for you! I can’t even imagine vomiting 1 or 2 times a day, let alone all day long. I had never even heard of that condition before you mentioned it. I guess I was just very blessed to not have that problem. As far as the weaning, sorry I don’t have any tips. I never was in that situation (no judgment please!:)) I hope it will go well and be over quickly! Take care!

    Amy

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