Oh, Lord, help me to see others as you see them.
Help me not to look at their flaws and their scars as I am prone to do.
Help me not to compare myself to others.
Help me to stop thinking of me first and then the world. Show me how to love as you love.
Help me to give up this pathetic need for approval.
Help me to surrender my vain imaginations about who I think I should be.
Help me to seek you and only you.
Help me to give up trying and planning to try and help me to just start doing. Show me your love and show me how to love.

I say this, not so people may one day say, “Look at what Jerry has become,” but so that they may not see me at all but see you. All I do is get in the way.

I would borrow Toby Mac’s lyrics and say, “If You wanna steal my show, I’ll sit back and watch You go,” but it really isn’t my show in the first place. I’ve tried hard to make it mine, but it’s not. I understand now that I strive after all the wrong things. I seek you in words, but in my heart it’s all about me and my need for meaning and purpose.

Oh Lord, it is so easy to get my motives turned upside down. I know little to nothing about service. The one serving doesn’t stand up and say, “look at me, I am the server!” I understand John the Baptist’s words even more now, “He must increase, but I must decrease.”

Forgive my faithless wanderings.
Forgive my my habitual obsession with self. I say this, but I know you already have.
Thank you, Lord, for loving me despite my many failings and forgiving every one.
Thank you for loving me unconditionally.
Thank you for being my God, my Father and my friend.
Amen.

I share this, not out of vanity, but because I know many of you may be feeling like something is missing in your walk with Jesus. Many of you, like me, have spent most of your Christian walk wading on the edge of the water, afraid to dive in, afraid to surrender everything, unwilling to dive headlong into the deep, because you’re trapped in the endless, repetitious pursuit of self that this world has to offer.
It’s all about your job, your family… your life. Faith has become something that you try to include in your life, instead of letting it consume your life. You define your faith, instead of letting it define you.
Radical passion has been replaced religious ritual. And love has become something you say but not necessarily do.

If this is not you, ignore this but if it is… stop what you are doing and PRAY! And keep praying every day for God to change your heart and your life. Read the Bible every day, especially the gospel accounts, where you can see Jesus’ heart for the lost, broken and desperate, and pray that he would change your heart to match his own.

And, finally, begin to seek ways to impact the every day lives of others. I say this as a hypocrite, but I say it anyway because this is my heart’s desire. If I died tomorrow, what will be my legacy…that I worked a lot and complained about money and all the things that keep breaking down?

When i die, I want it to be said that I lived for Christ or, rather, he lived through me. I want it to be said that I loved unconditionally and gave unselfishly and that I did because I was loved and I was given beyond all measure. I sure you do too.

Thank you for reading this and God bless.
-Jerry

 

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2 Comments

  1. Well said! I love this, thanks so much for sharing your heart!

    Blessings,
    Tiffany

  2. Thank you for posting this. I really want to – got to – get off the edge and get into the deep. I know it’s worth it.

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